Reblog! Cam Girl Mansion and Adult Indie productions partner!
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Sex usually enhances my submissive head space, but I really like this. My first bdsm couple I played with told me not to safeword in public, since it “embarrasses the Dom.” They also did knife play while I was blindfolded without prior negotiation. When you’re new, excited, and want to try EVERYTHING, it’s hard to see clearly. Wish I had known this then! Reposted from: https://fetlife.com/users/1636226/posts/2354210
(This was not written by me!)
1. Sex of any kind does not need to enter play and for me personally, can sometimes get in the way of my headspace (two conflicting sensations that seems to want to cancel each other out at times).
2. Gorilla tape wrapped around boobs = HELL NO (a long-time joke now and funny as hell though not at the time!)
3. When I play publicly, there is NO shame in calling yellow/red and no pressure not to do so (for some reason, at the beginning, I struggled with this only during public play.). It brings no shame to your Top, Dominant, Master, etc.
4. Good Tops, Dominants, Masters, etc. feel at ease when they know they can trust their bottoms, submissives, slaves, etc to call safe words.
5. I do not need to treat other kinksters who identify as Tops, Dominants, Masters etc., like I am submissive. In fact, many prefer it if I don’t since I am not involved in power exchange with them (**Note, at certain play parties where certain protocols have already been established this may happen but it is with full knowledge and consent on everyone’s part.).
6. I can “protect” myself thank you very much and do not need other people’s at events. I may be submissive, but I am still a grown-up.
7. I do not need to engage in pointless back and forth messaging trying to “explain/defend” myself on Fetlife where someone says things to me like:
"Hey u r a submissive, u should suck my cok"
"Hey little gurl, i want to do horrible things to you"
"Call me sir, I am a Dome"
(The above statements are actual copies from messages I have received.)
8. Not everything everyone writes on Fetlife is solid educational stuff that I should adhere to and follow (regardless of how many “loves” it receives). At the same time, there is a lot of good stuff on here that I can take things from that apply to me. :)
9. If I tell someone outside of my circle of partners information I consider to be private, there are zero guarantees it will remain so.
10. I find this one paramount. EVEN THOUGH I AM A SUBMISSIVE AND ENJOY THE POWER EXCHANGE DYNAMIC, IN THE END, IT IS ME THAT GETS TO DECIDE WHAT HAPPENS TO MY BODY. I HOLD THE TRUMP CARD, THE RED FLAG, THE STOPLIGHT, THE FOGHORN.** And in a safe environment, within MY limits, I enjoy playing within them and with very trustworthy people, a little bit of consensual stretching of them :)
That’s all folks! As I grow as a switch and develop my toppy side, I am sure that list will be made soon as well :).
With @Abbey_Rhode. I heart her, obviously!
And then licking it clean when I’m done.
Eating a corn dildo
Intimacy is not who you let touch your genitalia. Intimacy is who you text at 3am about your dreams and fears. Intimacy is giving someone your attention, when ten other people are asking for it. Intimacy is the person always in the back of your mind, no matter how distracted you are.